Common Grounds Online ran off a Jeff Foxworthy-type list earlier this week of "You might be an Evangelical if ..." jokes. JollyBlogger piped in with his own self-effacing take on Presbytarians and Baptists, and Adrian Warnock followed with a list on Charismatics. Refusing to be left out, I offer:
You might be a Vineyardite if ...
1. You think church planting begins with an acoustic guitar and a stool.
2. You've ever begun a prayer with the official, "Oh God, Oh God, Oh God ..."
3. When shaking someone's hand, the shaking is involuntary.
4. You don't have a problem serving the sacrament using grape Kool-Aid and Pop Tarts.
5. You don't know any Church songs or hymns written before 1982.
6. You own more khaki pants than a Gap clerk.
7. When quoting from Calvin, it's accompanied by cartoon slides of a stuffed tiger and a 5-year-old boy.