Irony 'wasted' on ill-informed

By Gil Gadabout
Disassociated Press

ROSEVILLE, Calif. -- A liberal hipster visiting friends in this Sacramento suburb swore off sharing his humor with the general public Thursday after a particularly dry, ironic quip fell on deaf ears.

"It was just a waste of good wit," Olanzo Garcia, a 28-year-old Half Moon Bay, Calif., resident said. "This would've had them rolling back home."

The incident occurred when an unidentified 23-year-old Starbucks employee accidently spilled Garcia's non-fat latte espresso drink. Ashamed, the employee began profusely apologizing.

Garcia reportedly offered, "It's alright, honey. We're in a 'blue' state. We don't crucify people here."

When people failed to acknowledge the joke in reference to the 2004 presidential election, Garcia left without further comment. He said he could only assume the "ignorant Valley hicks" in the coffee shop either didn't appreciate the liberal slant or weren't "as informed" as the Bay Area amateur pundit.

"Maybe they should turn off the Fox News channel and learn how to read," Garcia said.

Tim Erity of the American Center for Ironic Justice said Garcia's experience is a common one for city slickers unaccustomed to suburban and rural sensitivities.

"American urbanites are just going to have to learn how to be patient with those with less access to high technology and advanced central plumbing," Erity said. "The rest of the country will catch up and be assimilated as progress catches up, but it's going to take time."

Erity said the ACIJ has recorded over 22,000 incidents of missed ironic punch lines since George W. Bush was re-elected to the White House last November. He said irony analysts are predicting more of the same, with perhaps increased insensitivity leading up to the 2008 election.

"It's a trend right now. Not everyone can have a sense of humor like Michael Moore."